A Letter to Harper || becoming a big sister

we are EIGHT weeks in with our little love bug, Tanner!

whoa!!

as if I thought time flew when Harper was a baby, it is flying even faster with baby number two- Tanner! but it is so great, and I truly LOVE being a family of four!

I can only imagine what it will be like when we get to baby number four ;)

I was looking back and found this 'letter' (if that's what you want to call it) to/for Harper that I had written towards the end of my pregnancy with Tanner. man was I feeling emotional and mixed about bringing our new baby to the world! as I read through, I felt some of those feelings again, and yet I also realize how many of my fears/concerns weren't anything I needed to worry about. and what a peace that brings to me now!! Harper is AMAZING at her role as a BIG sister (at the little age of just two!). not once has she had resentment, jealousy, or sadness about baby Tanner coming into our lives and her no longer being my only baby.

I love both of these two with my whole heart. there isn't anything like it.

so here it is. a little bit of my heart on my sleeve.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

she has no idea how many changes are to come in just a couple short weeks. her world is going to change. so much good, yet some hard things too. it's no longer going to be just her and I in our days. she's going to have to share me and I'm going to have to learn how to divide myself between my two babies. she's my world and fear of the unknown creeps in to think that I will no longer be able to give her all of me. she doesn't even know how her world is about to be rocked.

I think of seeing her and saying goodbye the last time as a family of three. as we leave her when we're about to welcome her new sibling into the world, I will say 'I love you and goodbye' one last time while it's still just her. the next time I see her our life won't be just her anymore.

as I sit here writing this with tears rolling down my face, emotions are flooding. emotions I haven't felt until now. at 38 weeks pregnant. maybe it's because it's becoming 'real' to me. and it's no longer just talking about what's to come, but realizing we're fully in it and it is so, so close to being our new reality.

I find myself feeling these emotions of sadness and guilt for what I'm taking away from Harper. soon she will no longer be our one and only.

I find myself feeling emotions of joy and excitement for such a great gift of a little brother that we will be giving her.

I've heard so many moms say before that they wonder if they will be able to love a second child the way they've loved their first. will they have enough love in them?

my wonder and concern falls a little different. I KNOW I will be able to love this new little love of ours just as much as I felt that instant love for Harper. but will I still be able to give Harper the love and attention that she needs while at the same time caring for our new baby boy. am I going to be taking away from her and sacrificing her needs?

I know we will get there and we will be just fine.

I know deep in my heart that there will certainly be challenges for both Brandon and I and for Harper as we adjust to our new life as four. but I also know it is going to bring us all so much joy. for her to learn what it is to have a sibling and love on him the way I know she will... that there, will be priceless.

I love you my sweet girl. you will always be the one who made me a mama. you will always be the one who got the piece of my heart first. that love will never, ever change. I am excited and nervous to watch you step into this new big role as a sister. I just wish I could explain to you what is coming our way.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .


Tanner has been nothing but pure joy to our family. joy that stomps every bit of concern I felt when writing that 'letter'. the Lord's plan is ever so perfect and I feel somewhat silly for the fear and doubt I ever had. not only have Brandon and I been given the gift of a new baby, but Harper has been given the gift of a sibling. and there is absolutely nothing like witnessing sibling love!

xoxo

-Brittney

follow along on instagram @brittneyhjelseth

OUR TABLE || Freezer Meals

FREEZER. MEALS.

those two words can put a busy mama's mind at so much ease. and in my case, a mama caring for a two year old + a newborn! 

a delicious (still homemade) meal that's ready to go without the need to prep the meal. 

I had mentioned back in my one month favorites how I had prepped freezer meals towards the end of my pregnancy. hands down the best thing I've done to prep for adding a new baby to our family. I still haven't had to actually make dinner yet! and we're 7 weeks in with our little Tanner. that's a combination of freezer meals, friends/family bringing us meals, and any other reason we haven't been home at dinner. but I still have a good handful of them in the freezer and it gives me a peace of mind that I don't have to worry about what's for dinner. 

that question that is so often so dreaded.

"what's for dinner?"

must admit I went a little bit overboard with how many I made, but when you have an extra freezer in the garage that's just waiting to be filled... it was plum full!

here are ones that I found on pinterst and made:

spaghetti casserole // this one was a win! I'll be saving this recipe to make it even not as a freezer meal

slow cooker sweet and tangy meatballs // simple, easy, and good! win, win, win!

slow cooker honey sesame chicken // we haven't had this one yet, but looks delicious.

spaghetti sauce // this has been my favorite spaghetti sauce recipe. I decided to make it, split it in two, and freeze it.

baked ziti // now this one we have tried, and honestly I wouldn't recommend it. it's fine, but there just isn't much flavor to it.

slow cooker 8-can taco soup // haven't had this one, but looking forward to it as Fall is rolling in!

ravioli lasagna // good, but a little bland.

crock pot sweet and sour bbq meatballs // still have this one to try, but how can you go wrong with meatballs, bbq, and sweet + sour?!

slow cooker black bean and corn salsa chicken // another one that is waiting for us :)

cheesy chicken and black bean enchiladas // these are a fave for sure!! I made them first while I was pregnant with Harper and they have carried through over the last two years!

 no question it is time consuming to make all these. it took me a good two afternoons. but I tell ya, it was so, so worth it.

a few tips from my experience:

-pull all your recipes, make that big, long grocery list, and knock all your shopping out in one big trip.

-use frozen, diced onions. save yourself from all the chopping.

-make sure you have all the saran wrap, tin foil, disposable pans, and freezer ziplocs you'll need.

-take it one recipe at a time and try to do those that have the same meats back to back.

-recruit your mom or a friend to help.

-being SO pregnant, you might find yourself being SO over it when you're about half way through (I did!)... and remind yourself that you'll be happy you did all this once baby arrives!

freezer meals are our dinner life line right now!

Xoxo

-Brittney

Tanner's newborn photos

we had Tanner's newborn pictures done when he was just a mere eight days old with our favorite photographer, Kristal. I truly love every single picture. she has a way of capturing those sweet, real life moments. this has been such a precious time for our little family and to have moments to look back on of those first days with our baby boy- it's priceless.

so now... a big over-share of our photos :)

I'm now so ready to order prints of these and hang them around our home :)

Xoxo

-Brittney

follow along on instagram @brittneyhjelseth